Business Jargon Generator

It’s the start of a new year my fine marketing muse friends, what do you say that we ease our way into our 2022 journey with some lighthearted fun, as it will only get more serious and complicated from here, right?

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O.K. here we go…

Type in the words business jargon generator into Yoda, (that’s code for Google for those new to this thread), and check out some of the sites that will auto-generate “dazzlingly fancy new business buzzwordy gibberish” – it will surely put a smile on your face.

But once you’re done having fun creating some automagical corporate B.S., consider how scary and disturbing it is that the real world sounds a lot like this!

It’s true.

Don’t ask me why, but everything these days seems to have some weird “Orwellian” undertones and vibes going on, or maybe it’s just me.

Maybe I’m suffering from marketing jargon rage and need to vent!

Either way, you look at it, the world is in a strange place these days…

… now I’m starting to understand why everybody is in a hurry to escape to the metaverse and live a new and more interesting digital life.

Heck, even Facebook has had enough of Facebook and is running for the metaverse—they even changed their name to Meta just in case anyone was confused on where they were going.

It’s the perfect paradox…

… is digital the new analog?

It’s no wonder that marketing and the buzzards that peddle it are so absurdly out of touch with reality today.

Back to the jargon generator for a minute…it got me thinking about my own jargon-ability, and I found that I’m guilty as anyone when it comes to my inability to be jargon-free.

Take the expression “now, more than ever…” for example, you see brands, politicians, self-proclaimed thought leaders (more on that below), and other important people using this all the time, and sadly, upon reflecting, I’ve used more than I would care to admit.

But not more, I’m officially out of the “now, more than ever” BS’iness because it’s probably the best example of meaningless jargon out there.

It’s just a buzzy attempt to add emphasis and importance to what is not, so there—I’m done with it!

My advice to you, stay away from the jargon jar and only use real ingredients in your vocabulary, no nitrates are needed to make it sound delicious!

On Thought Leadership

Another perfect paradox.

Now, more than ever…the world needs more thought leadership.

Now, that was fun, wasn’t it!

I’ve got some breaking news for you all—there is no such thing as a thought leader today.

Just like the marketing buzzards that have destroyed the sanctity of advertising and trust, the self-proclaimed thought leaders have destroyed any and all “leadership” of thought.

Need a salt test to prove it?

Gladly—shake a little expert seasoning on this for starters…

… when everyone is a thought leader, no one is a thought leader.

Get it?

Back in the day (much better than “now, more than ever” wouldn’t you say?) there was such a thing as a thought leader though, but the qualifications were much harder.

Joel Kurtzman, editor of Strategy+Business, first coined the term “thought leadership” back in 1994, and here is what he said:

“Thought Leaders are those people who possess a distinctively original idea, a unique point of view, or an unprecedented insight into their industry.”

Fast forward to 2022—anyone who posts any content online claims the title of a thought leader.

In the end, what we’re left with is low-quality thoughts, filled with biz jargon and a “more is better” content mantra.

It’s a noisy world out there folks and the sea of jargon surrounding the vast marketing continents is rising fast and will soon be flooding our shores.

Tread lightly as the idioms of idiocy attempt to steal your words and lead your thoughts astray, for one day you too might don a well-dejected thought leader badge and buzzardly disposition. 

Stay alert and unruly out there ~

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