Do Donut Shops Need Marketing?
My recent “donut shop marketing” Google query returned about 10,700,000 results. Wow, I thought to myself – maybe donuts do need marketing.
Here are some quick page one search result excerpts:
“Have a website that gets the word out. Donuts are beautiful, and your website should be too…”
“Be social. Social media can pay huge dividends for donut shops…”
“Show off the beauty of your donuts.”
“Be unique. Make sure that you market in a way that emphasizes the uniqueness of your product…”
Next question…
…do donuts need differentiating?
Are there distinct degrees of donut beauty and dough uniqueness that need to be highlighted and articulated so that potential “donuteers” can analyze, study, and weigh the best options before their next indulgence?
Methinks not.
The best donut shop marketing I’ve ever seen…Randy’s Donuts.
Just go with the big freaking donut man! That about says it all, doesn’t it?
The moral to this story – It’s not the uniqueness of your donut that matters, it’s the uniqueness and remarkability of your marketing that matters most.
Donut Marketing
Well, I hate to admit this, but “donut marketing” is a thing.
Don’t believe me? Google it and you’ll find 21,100,000 results.
You really can’t make this shit up.
According to an article in the Arizona Republic, (now part of the USA Today Network)
“Donut marketing is an online marketing strategy where businesses create a company website and then use a variety of other marketing mediums to attract visitors to the site. It’s highly interactive, employing marketing tools that not only tout what a company has to offer but also create a community where current and prospective customers can connect with the company and each other.”
That sounds…(well, I’ll refrain for a moment.)
Apparently, donuts are analogous to lots of marketing and advertising strategies.
I also stumbled upon this tasty morsel…
… What is a donut in advertising?…
… Here is what frugalmarketing.com had to say
“a donut is a commercial with the same beginning and end and a “hole” in the middle for changing copy. Using a donut can give you brand awareness by keeping the same theme while changing the message.”
Who knew that visiting the local donut shop could teach us so much about marketing and advertising strategy?
Obviously, there is more to donuts than originally meet the eye, or mouth, for that matter.
This just reminds me of the silliness of today’s current state of marketing…
…the lingo…
…the hyperbole…
…the shiny new “donut” colloquialisms…
…the sheer MADNESS of it all!
If you want to learn something about marketing, know this – nobody really knows anything, and 99.9% of people that speak marketing are full of donuts.
There, I said it. I’m feeling much better now. Thanks for the platform.
An Ode to the Almighty Donut
To be clear, donuts are a big deal.
In fact, over 10 billion donuts are consumed in the U.S. every year.
Now, I don’t know how true that stat is (Yoda gave it to me) but if all of us 300 million Americans consumed 10 billion donuts per year that would mean that…
…EVERY AMERICAN CONSUMES ABOUT 33 DONUTS A YEAR ON AVERAGE.
(Note: the capitalization above is for extreme emphasis.)
I don’t know about you, but I maybe ate ONE donut last year. And probably less than that the year before.
So, who the hell is eating all these donuts?
Must be the marketing folks – we know there’s at least 10 billion of them out there spewing sweet, sugary, highfalutin nonsense to the masses who are eager to consume it.
In conclusion…
…marketing ain’t donuts…
…and donuts ain’t marketing.
Don’t confuse the two, or you’ll end up confusing yourself.
Just like the rest of these donut-eating marketing buzzards.
